Secret Ghetto Santa: Parp Edition

Parp came through for me this year, and did a spectacular job since I didn’t particularly want anything and told him to go nuts. So he did.

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This is the one thing I did ask for. This is a blaxploitation remake of Get Carter. Most British people on IMDB pan this movie and say the Michael Caine version of Get Carter was so much better. But most British people on IMDB are rat soup eatin honkey mothafuckas and don’t count. It’s absolutely nuts. Pam Grier (SPOILERS!!!!) gets savaged by lions. I am absolutely not making this up.

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This was a great gift because I lost my bottle opener a while ago and I never bothered getting a new one because I have a pair of scissors with one. So I’m definitely not going to lose this one. A minor quibble: the lack of color in his full body seamless black uniform makes me think less luchador and more rubber suit inflation fetishist who is clearly into choking. But hey, as long as he gets the job done he can do whatever he wants on his own time.

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These came in 2 separate packages. I wish I opened this one first because the bubble wrap around the bottle opener was a pain in the balls. It has a money clip to it which makes it extra handy although I’ll have to test and see if it’s as likely to open up in my pocket as I think it will. Still, it’s handy to have around the house. And that’s a box of 100 sharpened utility blades, no less. That’s an important thing for every American to have when they have to get a retail job post-retirement.

Thanks Parp!

(5 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)

5 thoughts on “Secret Ghetto Santa: Parp Edition”

  1. Hey

    So as I told you on Elfster, you shall receive one last present from me, still need to ship this one from France though

    I’m glad you like everything, the blades are here for the Gerber EAB, as you’ll soon discover if not already, it uses utility blades so it will stay sharp forever 🙂

    The EAB shouldn’t open in your pocket

  2. yeah, that little gerber is the bomb. I gave away like six of them last christmas, I carry one every day. it won’t open on you, but once you start carrying it in the watch pocket of any jeans where it is always right there on top for you, well, money? thats what wallets are for.

  3. Confirmed it stays closed after some field testing. I normally keep a minimum of cash in my wallet but since my debit card went tits up I’ve been rolling around with cash lately. Money clips are a great way of keeping track of easily lost featherlight bundles of paper. It looks like a handy thing to keep in your watch pocket (I went through a brief pocket watch phase before I came to my senses) but I’ll probably have to remind myself to take it out. Still, it looks like it could survive a wash cycle or five.

    Thanks again, Parp!

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