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Question/Advice/Help

September 22, 2014 12:04 pm GMT -5

Long time lurker and I have a few questions for you guys. Do you eat pussy? If so, is it because you enjoy it or because it pleases your partner or some other reason? And if you don’t, why don’t you? I am in a relationship with a guy & he doesn’t do oral. Being a woman that is almost a deal breaker for me. We have been together for almost 2 years & I’ve gotten it 3 times. And of course, since hes avoided it for so long I’m now self conscious when he attempts it (last night was the 3rd time, ever) & I can’t even enjoy myself & have him stop because I know hes hating every minute of it. I bathe regularly, I’m not dirty by any means, I’m not extremely over weight or ugly. I’m not fully shaved but It’s well maintained and trimmed. IS PORN RUINING MY LIFE? I mean, guys in porn eat the vagina so I assumed all men did or did I get the only man who doesn’t? Should I shave completely(i guess guys don’t like hair down there at all anymore). I also (like a lot of women) most of time don’t get off during intercourse alone so I’m always left hanging and its VERY SEXUALLY FRUSTRATING to the point I’m thinking about banging someone else and/or leaving him. He’s a great guy but I honestly don’t think I can go the rest of my life without it. Any opinions or advice on how to deal with this issue?
Long time lurker and I have a few questions for you guys. Do you eat pussy? If so, is it because you enjoy it or because it pleases your partner or some other reason? And if you don’t, why don’t you? I am in a relationship with a guy & he doesn’t do oral. Being a woman that is almost a deal breaker for me. We have been together for almost 2 years & I’ve gotten it 3 times. And of course, since hes avoided it for so long I’m now self conscious when he attempts it (last night was the 3rd time, ever) & I can’t even enjoy myself & have him stop because I know hes hating every minute of it. I bathe regularly, I’m not dirty by any means, I’m not extremely over weight or ugly. I’m not fully shaved but It’s well maintained and trimmed. IS PORN RUINING MY LIFE? I mean, guys in porn eat the vagina so I assumed all men did or did I get the only man who doesn’t? Should I shave completely(i guess guys don’t like hair down there at all anymore). I also (like a lot of women) most of time don’t get off during intercourse alone so I’m always left hanging and its VERY SEXUALLY FRUSTRATING to the point I’m thinking about banging someone else and/or leaving him. He’s a great guy but I honestly don’t think I can go the rest of my life without it. Any opinions or advice on how to deal with this issue?
I assume that means he’ll never touch my butt either 🙁 🙁 🙁
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39 thoughts on “Question/Advice/Help”

  1. I’m going to echo some similar sentiments: be an adult about this. Don’t be shitty and start banging other dudes, don’t withhold sex from him until he asks what the deal is. If you’re making him stop because you’re all hung up about him not enjoying it, he’s going to think he’s bad at it and he’s going to be less inclined to try to bombard you with an act that’s not going to do anything for you. Here’s the thing about asking strangers for advice: based on your output, we’re compelled to draw a mental picture of you and that’s how the advice is centered. To me, you sound like kind of a pain in the ass with poor communication skills. I have a feeling you’re quite adept in the “Are You Mad at Me Game”. You know what I’m talking about.

    Your basis of reference is pornography, that’s why you’re fucked. Do you make that SHHHKKKK sound when you’re aroused? Do you moan when you get titfucked? Do you do ass to mouth like you actually want to put something that was in your ass into your mouth and suck on it full force? (don’t answer that last one -ed.) You are basing your sex life off of rehearsed sex acts which barely reflect actual sexuality. How old are you? Serious question there, but table that for now. Thinking every dude loves to eat pussy because you see paid actors do it every time is like thinking girls with big natural tits like to have them slapped at random intervals. Porn doesn’t teach you how to be better at sex, it just teaches you how to make a lot of noise and hold your jizz in to save film and studio time. Stop basing expectations on what you see in porn, it turns you into a shitty person in the bedroom.
    You’ve been with this guy for 2 years. If lack of pussy eating is a deal breaker, break the deal and stop wasting each other’s time. If you’re considering fucking around behind his back, you’re a piece of shit and breaking up with him will free up plenty of time to go fuck yourself. BE A MATURE ADULT AND HUMAN BEING. If getting eaten out a certain amount of times in a time period is you priority for a healthy relationship, go find someone who can do that. And in the future, openly communicate your needs: this is what I want. What do you want? This is how I like this or that. Has it ever occurred to you that you might need to tell a fellow how you like to be eaten out? I certainly hope you’re not asking him to do it after he logjammed the holy hell out of you because you might want to examine your expectations there, sister.
    Summary: stop talking to us. Talk to him. Straighten it out.

  3. Your guy is clearly a selfish fuck, literally. Me, I always open up with some cunnilingus, as I’m the sort who gets off on getting her off. I know no faster or more effective route to achieving those ends than getting face first in that pussy. Too bad your guy either doesn’t know or doesn’t care about that.

    I suppose you could punish him by withholding sex, but he sounds like the selfish type. If you are no longer an open source for sex, he might go elsewhere. I suggest giving him some incentive. No doubt he’s got something he’d like you to do to him. If you’re willing, I’d suggest you offer him a trade – give me what I want and I’ll give you want you want. If that doesn’t work, dump his ass and find someone who understands how to handle a woman’s needs.  

  4. For clarification. Does he expect oral from you but doesn’t provide it to you? That would be an absolute kick-him-in-the-ass as he leaves offense. If he wants the goods but doesn’t provide then 2 years is to, to long to have tolerated it.

  7. This is why personal preferences should never go into advice giving. Some people hate giving oral sex. If a woman came to you saying every time she had sex with her boyfriend he’d go into facialabuse.com mode, you might say DUMP THAT INSENSITIVE PRICK. Or you might say PRACTICE YOUR GAG REFLEX AND LEARN TO LOVE IT, YOU LUCKY SLUT. Both of those are shitty responses because you’re projecting your preferences on two people who may have vastly different sexual interests.

    You eat pussy like an ice cream sandwich in a Harlem heat wave! Goo fer you. You do it not because you’re crazy about it but she likes it or it’s only far after she cops your joint? Goo fer you. You don’t have any experience but am willing to learn? Goo fer you. You don’t like it, never going to like it and no one will change your mind? Goo fer you too, but you’re going to want a backup plan.
    If the only way your girl could get off is if you ate 9 cans of Raviolios and then barfed in her ass gape, do you think that would be helpful information to share? Advice: it’s not about you.

  8. Yeah.  That’s what I was trying to say. But then I got stoned and distracted.

    Mr. Whistle, do you have a newsletter? Because I would like to subscribe to it.

  12. This lousy tramp is gay to 51% i tell ya to 100%!
    Who eat pussy doesn’t love is not a heterosexual.
    Do not hesitate long, but ditch that nasty kinky pervert!
    At any time you can find a better man! :nod:

  17. Honestly, I really feel she should take Rapewhistle’s advice.  It turns out he has a pretty level head and is a fairly well adjusted individual.  He would make a good Space Ghetto version of Dear Abby.   “Dear Rapewhistle, I have another potato stuck in my ass and Uncle Otis won’t help me get it out.  What should I do?  -Anonymous”.  I can see it now!

  19. yea I’m sure it’s a regular user with an alt account..

    1. makes new account
    2. makes perfect image and text post
    a couple hours later

    I think it is real issue for the poster but they didn’t
    want to use their regular account.

    Whatever.. it added a little intrigue and the replies were funny.

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