So here it is. Obama is no fan of Israel and vice versa. Iran wants Israel completely eliminated, is developing nukes to do the job, and Israel is chomping at the fucking bit to fuck up Iran in a meaningful way, but to do so now would also drive a wedge even further up Obama’s squeaky cheeks costing them America’s support. Soooo right before the election, Israel strikes Iran HARD. The whole Middle East is sent into total turmoil. Rivers of fire, cats mating with dogs, Imams killing each other with bacon bullets, students going to class… total insanity… And Obama will be completely paralyzed, sputtering about how Bush made this happen, and telling us that if congress would only compromise and work together across the aisle like he has always been willing to do, and pass his bills, everything would be all right. .And then, when war is clearly inevitable, who is America going to turn to? The guy that keeps letting wars go on and on, when he’s not starting new ones? The guy who can’t even wipe himself, the ineffectual pussy from the party that can’t wipe him either, or the hard-ass Republicans? Israel will support anyone who runs against Obama, Obama’s supporters are already pretty much fed up with his shenanigans, and with another war on the horizon (which will be easily blamed on Obama by all the Republicans) there will be a landslide victory for whoever the Republicans nominate. Fuck, even a Pizza DELIVERY DRIVER could do a better job than Obama. So there will be a big exciting war (possibly with nukes!), Obama will be gone, I will be relaxing in bed watching bombs explode in cities and towns throughout the middle east, listening to daily body counts on CNN and saying “I told you so”. The world will be a beautiful place. And I will laugh and laugh and laugh. Actually, I already am!
Anyway, a big fat jucy Israeli – Iranian war sucking in all the Middle East, beginning right before elections. You heard it here first.