I am not a douchebag IRL, I am a very nice guy, I do network engineering for a living, and I am away from home this week for work.
After a long day of blah blah blah, I drive to the crappy motel I booked and find a pretty packed parking lot. After hunting for a spot for a few minutes, I find this:
I don’t usually succumb to carnal thirsts like this, but something came over me and I immediately headed out to the nearest 7-11 and obtained the following items:
I am now waiting for 3 AM.
There is a sign outside, prominently stating that this particular lodging establishment gives not a single shit about property loss or damage in these parking lots, and I have a feeling that this douchebag is sleeping very soundly.
Ghetto, I find myself unable and unwilling to talk myself out of this hugely risky and stupid urge.